The beautiful memorial garden stones featured on this page can be found at  this link

This information is from http://counselingforloss.com and has been designed to help you and your family through this difficult time and covers many aspects of the grieving process.

When a person dies suddenly from an accident, murder or suicide, most often it is an adolescent or young adult involved, it also violates our sense of what is right or normal. Death from cancer, stroke or debilitating heart condition, by the very nature of these illnesses, helps us to prepare for what is to come. Typically, it is an elderly member of a family who suffers such an illness. Yet the death of a loved one still comes as a shock to us even if we have had some forewarning.

SHOCK
Initially, the reaction is one of profound disbelief, the mind rejects such unacceptable news.
The survivor in fact may become so numb emotionally that a mother, for example,
may even be incapable of crying over the death of her child.
Tina Marie
I think of you in silence I often speak your name all I have are memories and your picture in a frame.

"Gone yet not forgotten, although we are apart, your spirit lives within me forever in my heart."
Understanding the Grieving Process
For those of you who don't know me and my story, this lovely lady is my daughter, Tina Marie. 
A loving wife, mother, daughter, sister, niece, aunt , granddaughter and great granddaughter.
Tina was murdered and the killer is still out there. My family and I have lived the past 3 years in total heartache. I could write a book about all that we have experienced.  All the emotions and frustrations we have dealt with during our search are hard to place into words.  But I have learned so much and I would like to share with you some things about grieving the loss of
a loved one that may help you understand better.

   As intelligent as we human beings are and as much as we know and are able to control different aspects of our lives: there is still so much that we do not know about human emotions, the working of the mind or the part that chance plays in our lives.
We find it almost impossible to explain to a grieving mother or father why their son or daughter committed suicide or why they were killed. We have, however, come to understand the experience of grief.  We do know, for instance, how a survivor will generally react when informed of the unexpected death of a loved one.
This information is from http://counselingforloss.com and has been designed to help you and your family through this difficult time and covers many aspects of the grieving process.

When a person dies suddenly from an accident, murder or suicide, most often it is an adolescent or young adult involved, it also violates our sense of what is right or normal. Death from cancer, stroke or debilitating heart condition, by the very nature of these illnesses, helps us to prepare for what is to come. Typically, it is an elderly member of a family who suffers such an illness. Yet the death of a loved one still comes as a shock to us even if we have had some forewarning.

SHOCK
Initially, the reaction is one of profound disbelief, the mind rejects such unacceptable news.
The survivor in fact may become so numb emotionally that a mother, for example,
may even be incapable of crying over the death of her child.
ANGER
A second reaction may be one of anger. Often times survivors express an unpacifiable anger toward some person who appears to be responsible for the death: the 'incompetent' doctor; the 'negligent driver', or the 'careless' friend. Even God may be blamed for allowing such a tragedy to occur. At the same time that anger is focused on the person to punish themselves, even to the point of serious injury or death. Anger is a profound and frequently uncontrollable emotion. It may at times be directed toward the one who has died. Anger is one of the more difficult aspects of the grief experience for the survivor.

GUILT
A third reaction often experienced by a survivor is a feeling of personal responsibility for the death. Irrational guilt can sweep over the survivor in relentless waves. A mother, for example, may feel just as responsible for the death of a son that occurred a thousand miles from home and under circumstances over which she has no control as a mother whose child has been poisoned with a household cleanser thoughtlessly left within reach.

SHAME
In the case of suicide, especially, such feelings as guilt can also be accompanied by an overriding sense of shame and embarrassment. The suicide of a child or spouse can be interpreted as an implicit, if not explicitly, act of rejection. To be compelled to face the fact that the deceased preferred to take his or her life rather than to continue living can induce a wrenching sense of shame in the survivor, and with it the loss of self-esteem.


BEHAVORIAL CHANGES
Far more common, however, are the abrupt changes in behavior that can be observed in survivors. Such changes include: inability to sleep (insomnia); lack of appetite; an increase in smoking or drinking; repetitive speech or actions, impulsive acts such as quitting a job or breaking off a long-term friendship; persistent irritability or emotional outbursts or acts of violence toward a family member, friend, or even a total stranger. Survivors should keep in mind the possibility of such behaviors, and their general "normalizes." They should be cautioned that when such behavior threatens to become injurious to themselves or others, professional guidance or assistance should be considered.
Depression can be the hardest stage of all and is often accompanied with sudden extreme feelings of loss, hopelessness, and frustration.  It is also common to experience
a lack of control over your surroundings, and a general sense of  numbness.
NEWS MEDIA
Frequently in the case of sudden unexpected deaths, particularly those of a more unusual nature - suicide, homicide, or sudden infant death (SIDS) - the intrusion of the news media or public agencies into the lives of the surviving family members is potentially fraught with trauma and psychic injury. Careful attention needs to be paid to the survivors' grief and their privacy and dignity need to be protected. The potentially abrasive and insensitive behavior of newspaper reporters, cameramen, and other media representatives need to be defended against, lest they aggravate the grief of the survivors. So, too, might well-meaning public officials whose task it is to investigate the circumstances surrounding the death, be cautioned. An act or gesture or even the intonation of a voice that implies negligence or responsibility for the death on the part of a blameless survivor can only add to the burden of loss.

COPING
What can be done when the tragedy of death suddenly strikes? This is a time when a survivor needs the support of other family members and friends, the clergy and possible other members of the caring professions. This is often the very time when such comfort and support is most resisted or rejected by the survivor. The survivor should do everything in his or her power, however, to overcome the impulse to refuse assistance and to recognize the value of outside
help as well as the need for it. On the other hand, a relative, friend or caregiver should
continue to stand by the survivor and assist him or her whenever possible, even in the
face of  protest  and anger. Grief, we have come to learn, is too profound
an emotional experience to be left solely a private matter.
"A gift for such a little while, your loss just seems so wrong,
you should not have left before us, it's with loved ones you belong."
"Your memory is my keepsake with which I'll never part.
God has you in His keeping, I have you in my heart."
All the stages or emotions of dealing with grief can be a vicious cycle that can trap you in a never-ending circle of grief.  Reaching acceptance is the gateway to closure. As you gain acceptance you will once again treasure your memories and be able to move on with your life.
You are not alone with these feelings.

Believe me.. I have traveled this journey myself and it is a road I know too well. But someone it seemed was always there to catch me when I fell. There were the times He carried me when my legs were much too weak. There were the times He was my eyes when mine were full of tears.
And all the times He comforted me and helped me face my fears.
This friend of mine is with you too, my dear friends. He's been
there  all along. Just reach for Him and take His hand.
It's where you now belong.

God bless you all.
Linda
(Tina's mom forever)
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The beautiful memorial garden stones featured on this page can be found at  this link

When grief strikes a mother,
there is no end to it.
The earth parches, its
glittering waters gone.
Everything is barren.
Cattle starve for lack of grain.
Nothing grows.
Even the Gods are destitute,
even the altar flames blow out.
Such is a mother's grief, bitter
and endless, for her lost child.